23122008------------------->is it me or what?

i seriously have no idea wat's bothering my mind right now..i don't know wat's so wrong..
maybe is my fault..maybe is just me!seriously i'm afraid getting ditched for the second time..
ok so it's phobia..i thought i could simply overcome it!but i couldn't!!!I CAN'T!
yes i love you but the phobia..so?it takes time isn't it?
every now and then when i'm alone i would remember the days i got ditched..
the pain the memories..how i wish there's this soup that would wash away all memories..
sorry kent i am seriously sorry....
yes u made me fell in love..u made me said that 3 words...u made me miss you like crazy..
but u didn't remove the phobia..
i could finally hate him from the bottom of my heart...credits to the letter he wrote..
BUT THE CRAZY PHOBIA MY DEAR..THE PHOBIA!
ever wonder why i would want a fight?
i never had a great fight before..a fight would get the hearts closer..
after that fight think properly..maybe u would know each other more..
we had one yesterday right?wasn't that good..at least i know you hate last minute stuffs..
is just a week..there's so many weeks more to go..
seriously..could the GOD gimme more confidence?at least for the last time?
at least i think it be worthy for me to give out more......
sigh ...........
how long would the happiness last?how long till sadness starts?
keep the fingers across...

*today...laren told me something bout mistletoe..haha..everyone know wat's a mistletoe and i don't..so u shud kiss ur lover under the mistletoe tree..but...would the tale be true?