10042009------------>the feelings jux came out of the blue

hmm..been having this weird routine lately..a driver for both the guys..my bro and my big baby..well..fetching roc be lessen dad's burden..fetching the big baby because i wanna see him moar!couldn't really sleep lately..would wake up in fright during midnight..URGH!and is always 3am..wtf!as i have to wake up 515 in the morning..i get extremely tired after that..*sigh*why am i always having this dumb insomnia during exam eves?serious shit~

bah..back to the day..fucking got caught in the jam..due to my lateness!i left the hse around 625..sigh..sigh..shuda got up earlier and avoid the jam..but my SLEEP!?!?neway after sending roc..jln kuching was still kinda smooth that time..was listening to jj&ean in the car..ok i have this habit of playing loud music whenever i feel sad or down or watsoever you called..it wasn't that loud this morning..after the prank called they made to someone..i duno why..i felt like crying..

kinda weird aint it..i felt like crying out of the blue..early in the morning and its not even 7am yet!doink..maybe i'm over stressing myself..=( i duno..but i somehow forgotten the feeling of tears rolling down the cheek..i forgotten how to cry..i know i shudn't cry..i have to stay tough..i can't let myself fall before the war starts..darling is already stressful..i can't add anymore stress onto his burdenized shoulders..that's why i stopped my tears from falling =)

i'm sorry my friends at the college..been really stress lately that i don't really remember how to smile~let the war ends and i'll get myself back to normal mode..i need to get fucking good grades or my parents will slice me up!well..can't deny the fact that i won't let myself fail so many times in my study life..life be too short for me to waste..cherish the time cherish everyone around you..

this morning had "ba zang" with kent..wow!i really miss my home-made "ba zang"...how i wish grandpa is still here..grandma be as healthy as before..BUT sigh..we can't look back to our past aint it?haha..neway..i need to find a way to deal with my sleepiness at 10am every morning..urgh..chicken essence doesn't really help =( had KFC snack plate for lunchie...and also CHEESY WEDGES..yummy yummy...

the piano tuner came..and..he told me that instead of buying one new piano..i shud actually send my piano mechanism for overhauling..due to the good condition of my piano..well my piano has been there for 10 years!my bday present from papa..then..ok lu...600 bucks..sigh..been spending a lot lately..i need one fast job..well i need 300 bucks for now..let mama pay half..or maybe i shud jux go withdraw from my bank?hmm...it depends tho..

another evening i spent watching one piece...i'm so in love with the anime..=) am gonna buy the comic as collection~YIPPIE!!!!i miss my boyfriend..ouh we be going to kr's school carnival 2mrw..hmm..jalan a bit then go home?ya i think it shud be done it that way=) piano lesson for me 2mrw..urgh..gonna be tiresome..