我是在想你的。。但是同时我还很贪心地不小心想起他了。。
所以今天下午我哭了。。因为我想起他对我的好了。。
对不起。。或许有一天你知道了之后你会想说你对我那10个月的好为什么会比不上他那一个月的好。。我真的会答不出吧。。。
当初他最不放心的事情发生了。。原来最没用的人是我。。我真的很失败。。
我很喜欢你，也很爱你。。只是你的一举一动实在太伤我了。。。
如果你都没有发觉到我的伤心，那我唯一能说得是你不够敏感罢了。。我不想在自欺欺人了。。
阿！！！！！
there's this lil thing that i've kept to myself for a long time...
been struggling with it for a long time as well....
not bout me being sensitive...urm just..helo?i can't stand those...
i think i have the right to list'em out one by one...RIGHT?
so ya..first....lets see....because i love him so much HENCE I THINK MY BELOVED one doesn't deserve to be treated like this by his so called "GOOD FRIENDS!"
when u people need him or his beloved smexy camera...u guys call him out...
when u guys need someone to share the bill or something...u guys invited him as well i think...
i hate gossiping bout people..so i blast it when i'm really pissed off...
is aite if you don't ask us along but don't fucking lemme realized that you're using us..
FOR EXAMPLE...there was once i asked u to pinjam me the car...woah!
a long lecture............................
then there's this time when i get back my car...
u wanted me to pinjam u my car...just to show off.........................................
thank god i said i need to think bout it...
then there's this time i used the A's car....
another lecture bout it i guess...........DON'T DO ANYTHING TO MY CAR...
yah like i'm gonna BANG IT or smth...
i haven't met any accidents before...
because of me always troubling people to fetch me home at night....
i don't need u guys to ask my bf to pay you ppl back....
IF YOU NEED SOMEONE TO PAY...GET IT BACK FROM ME!
i have friends that are hundred times better?
i have friends that will never click skipped button when i'm half way singing my song..without even seeking my permission...
i almost cried when someone skipped my song..just because u fetched us..doesn't meant that u have the right?!i can always pay the cab...
gaaaaaaah!watever it is....
if i ever realized this is going on again..i duno wat will happen..
just because i don't say anything doesn't meant that i don't know anything
this is unexpected...very surprising!i never had that thought that we'll go on for 10 months...i'm actually really happy...FYI i never got myself involved in a relationship for so long before..so yah it is no surprise that i'm SHOCKED!i love my bubu so much =)
well...i didn't realized till just now...i was telling him hey happy b-lated 10 months babe...then only i realized on our 10th month..we actually went to the beach together =D haha ^^ it wasn't a pleasant journey to be frank..i didn't enjoy much really =/ sorry~ anything that has got to do with you would be a sweet memory for me...
i was really tired that day and the pantai morib turned out to be the worst beach after port dickson..oh gosh!the sea water are urm..greyish and muddish =/ there aint much sea breeze lol..my best memory would be the piggy ride =D weeeeeeeeeeee it was fun..the sad thing is we didn't snapped pictures together except that 2 or 3 pathetic shots..as both of us were busy shooting other stuffs..
hmm..well..after that we headed home with the unpleasant ride again...holy!i really don't appreciate ppl that couldn't drive well and rammed their cars..love ur car and ur life please..do not fucking speed if you can't drive at that speed...rawr..cox u'll just make a fool outta urself..
one more thing is..i really hate it when i don't ask back the money from you please don't try asking it back from me..lol? if this is gonna happen that's it i'll count everything clearly...do not fucking take a fag without even buying another pack or offer yours..well it is once in a blue moon i see you buying ur own cigarettes..so don't touch my darling's..
now that i get my own car i will never need to trouble you...so just do not fucking as anything from my bf..i really don't like it...if you wanna count just fucking clear it off with me and not my bf..be a man!
well yesterday went to nash's open house..the nasi briyani is simply osum ^^ i love briyani so much..as well as the rendang mutton..weeeeeeee...thank you nash =D hurm..jack followed...didn't make it to the midnight movie with them..too tired and broke =/ well..instead of that bro and dear went pool-ing at ezy's..baby won ^_^v
dead tired and i dozed off right after i reached home...went church the next day..lol?i'm not a faithful buddhist or catholic..i have no idea wat am i..so just don't ask i don't know the answer...after that..went for the porridge..tasteless..hahaha..except for the fish..around 1pm dad called lol i flew home..haha..too much of lies so yah..need to be a good girl after sometime..
i got my car so now i can drive around myself =) need not trouble others already...yippie!
so i don't know why am i having insomnia days before exam..and even during exam!*rawr* i know i need to sleep..but the problem is i couldn't fucking have a good night sleep just the day before exam..like i go to bed at 11pm..then i'll jumped up from bed at 4am latest..or maybe 5am..this is definitely a fucked up situation =/
hmm..so yah today...went to darling's hse and disturbed him first before both of us went mid valley =) he became so adorable lately..i have no idea why..simply love him more!^^ isn't it a good sign?haha..sorry that i kept ming yi waited for us for half an hour =x i'm sorry..ended up at garden's food court doing maths...
didn't do much...i hate myself!why?cox when i'm doing exercises..i can solve the questions..but..DURING THAT STUPID EXAM..i have no idea why i couldn't solve them..oh lord!it was until both of us got so bored of maths..we left the place..before that during that crazily doing maths session..haha =) i did something really bad..=P
so we had zee awesome dinrar at ITALIANES..=) muackxx muackxx... hearts my baby so much...haha...one smoked salmon pizza, one bowl of mushroom soup, 2 hot chocolates, 1 bottomless ice lemon tea and and and lots of BREADS. =) that meal made me...epic full =]
after we walked ming yi to cititel...darling dropped by at the nikon event booth...hoho =) he finally got his hand in touched with the D3X...bet he's flying sky high =p summore asked me.."why you didn't snap a pic of me when i was holding the D3X"..hahaha ^^my adorable bf..is always adorable..sorry that didn't come across my mind and that fella kept looking at me..*shy*later kena complain =x
after everything and a lil window shopping we parted off...KTM sucks!!!*rawr*i entered the !@##@ train at 7.15 pm..imagine..i shud reach home by 7.45pm when today i reached home around 8.15pm..yes..the ktm is !@#@# train...kill it!burn it!slash it!i don't mind =) hahaha...
yah due to the fact that i'm being extremely LAZY and BUSY =/ i haven't get the time to create a new blog =) hahaha...so i'll stick to this old one first..weeeeeeee...wait till the day when i'm NO LONGER busy or lazy..hehe ^^
hmm..same old routine for almost everyday except that today when i was supposed to teach emmanuel law not really teach but to help him up you see cox no one's willing to help him =x my darling said he has got futsal going on and they counted me in..seriously that time my face went like this =.- hehe..i'm mean when i feels like it =)
i don't know it appears that whenever it comes to SUDDEN decision i get a bit urm pissed off..maybe i don't really enjoy being random..ha =P had a bit of urm misunderstanding but after we're back like before again muackxx..love you
so i tagged along to the futsal court as emmanuel couldn't make it..hmm..it was boring and urm warm there..lol? forced myself to study...a bit!you see i can't be unprepared for my law paper 2..like so wtf cox the topics i prepared for both papers all came out in paper 1..it turned out to be a total bullshit to me!RAWR!gimme something DIFFERENT please...the fuck is SI,DL,JP,HRA,LAY MAJISTRACY doing in paper 1?means..SENTENCING,CRIMINAL COURT STRUCTURE,POLICE POWERS,APPEALS and the rest of the crap will be popping out in paper 2...oh gosh!i hate reading those =x reading is FUN..memorizing is SICKENING X.X
went to the "metal beat"doctor there..my shoulder having infection AGAIN..i hate it!and it happens always WHEN I'M HAVING THOSE EXAMS..what kinda bullshit is it?grrrr....feels way better now =) hohoho...
tomorrow am meeting up with ming yi =) cute fella..haha^^happy happy...i seriously don't like the idea of my bf waiting for his best friend to get his undang exam done...when the other party hasn't even attend the 6 hours of crap talk course..and hasn't make any calls to the driving instructor yet!is already WEDNESDAY...ish...
not because of all my friends are having their bday on this particular day that's why i hate it..there's always a reason for me to hate something...and i really hate it to be today..
Gosh~so ya..being really lazy and felt DREADFUL when i thought of my studies..and at the same time felt so pressurized when i thought of failing for the 2nd time =/ is just so WTF!! Bought my beloved papers yesterday when i went mid valley with my baby...so..obviously i felt happy and haha!! i did my maths happily without getting frust over it...
my lunchie today was AWESOME!is *finger lickin good*weeeeeeeeeeeee thanks my baby..ok i know i've been spending A LOT...just this week...fuck!and i didn't spend my own money...i used my darling's money...omg!is so bad...ish!i'm feeling extremely guilty =/ my baby is still kind and loving =) hohoho...
back to my lunchie...so we had this ITALIAN food at taman desa =) omg omg...it was simply yummylicious =D i would rate it 9/10..there's always room for improvement for everything..total bill RM 71..lol...for lunch =) home-made PIZZA...yummy salmon fettucine..uber naise mushroom soup =P worth the money...hahahaha
i was caught red-handed doing smth BAD today =/ haha
wanted to trim my hair..BUT..ish i have no idea why are they charging so expensive in TD...so i ended up didn't trim any..i'd rather save that money to go for yummy food =D weeeeeeee
had cramps and i slept all day again =) went home around 7.30pm...was waiting for cab or bus to pass by...sadly no till joey asked darling to join them for eve's gig's performance...lately i have no mood to ask them to send me around..i'd rather pay RM 5 instead of troubling them..i have my reasons for that..just not that close to them and i have no mood and don't felt like to..they'd feel like they're so great sending you here and there and is as if you owe them one whole lots of things..i dun like that feeling..so yah not gonna ask them...
hopefully i can get the car by next week you see..i can start getting lost again =) hahahaa...and discover new route..weeeeeeee
i love my baby so much...why?why?why?hahaha..
As usual =) woke up at 5.30am...with a hungry stomach..went to the market with aunt..having the thought of studying till i finished my breakfast...i started talking to my dad..omg!we talked till..almost 8am..i was like wtf?dunid to study dy...weeeeee online checked for the info for my end of the year vacation =D weeeeeeeee......
after that went out...hmm..so ktm..BROKE DOWN again.. =/ reached darl's around 11.30am..stil having that crazy thought of touring kl..walking around..WHY?cox i bloody smart left my formula piece at home..can't do shits with my maths..you see i'm a lazy girl i don't remember formulaes.. =) wanted to sleep but i couldn't...
i told myself...well might as well just give those questions a try.. =) so i did...ouh that was when i felt so stupid...and stress...it was just mere stupidity i felt in me =/ i cried because i couldn't solve one stupid question..lots of attempts been made..and i still failed =( i wept at first then i broke down...after all the tears...i realized..it was all because of an 8 and an 18..i saw the wrong one..FUCK!so i ended up laughing at my stupidity...
well..i had a great time with my baby today...went to mid valley..he bought his flip-flops finally =) yippie!!and no matter how great is my ex..i love you and you know it..muackxx...a week till our 10th month =D happiness in the air..
just now...i had my best gift in my life after my birthday present in year 2000..my parents bought me a car...a fucking volvo =) i don't mind it being 2nd seriously...it looks BRAND NEW!so new that when i entered the car, that leather seat smell will just OH come after you...and everything look sooooooooooo NAISe!!
my car look smth like this =) with larger rims^^
i love my parents lar...especially my dad...all because he cares bout my safety...ah!i'm so lucky...i'm a lucky girl...super...uberly lucky..i have a boyfriend and parents that love me so much that words couldn't simply describe it =P *envy me*hahaha...thanks daddy..mummy and my baby =)
hmm..i stayed awake the whole night and made that decision outta no where..that i decided to go to church this morning =)
hehe..at 6am..i was SHOCKED to see kent talking on skype...hehe..had a game and off i left the house at 7.30am...
ouh the blardy blardy train came at 7.50am...i reached the kl station by 8.10...left 5mins to walk to church..
well..me being a lazy ass..stopped a taxi and i was there JUST IN TIME =D hurray ^^ the taxi driver was nice...hehe..*God bless him*
after service...went for BRUNCH...hungry...and sat down at a kopitiam for noodles =) *slurps*
food and drinks and puffing life off... =P went to bank..WOOTS...
headed home after that..had urm a small quarrel while waiting for the bus and in the bus =/
slept my afternoon off =x
woke up around 6pm..was about to go home and aunty was cooking CURRY CHICKEN!!!omg..i always wanted to try that =)
so i stayed for dinner *drools* while waiting for that...went out for a walk..supposed to be a good one..ended up fighting =/
sorry babe...maybe it's just me being paranoid..but i'm definitely a perfectionist..
dinner done =) it was..YUMMYLICIOUS ^^
ct then messaged both of us telling us to join them for hot pot =) so i joined..knowing that my mum will kill me..weeeeeee
waiting and waiting...8.15pm..a sudden blackout =O haha...whole jalan desa utama blackout..lol
finally at 8.30 he came and fetched us off...to sunway...for...kim gary?duno?
so it was kim gary at first...and finally seated at station one cafe =)
hmm..impressive this station one was way way way better compared to the one in OUG.. ={
mum called and potong stim..hahahaha...
left at 11pm...dad called..asked me get him his vit C and food..
reached home at 12am..why?wrong route =/ sigh sorry
p/s: can i have my car so i won't trouble others?lemme be the drivers instead... =)
yah all these should be done by the end of the year 2009 =)
OCT
1. a-lvls comes first before evrything =) so yah..STUDY HARD...STUDY SMART..
2. mum's birthday ...cake?
3. be well prepared for that november papers..^^
NOV
1. hehe...slim down =)
2. econs!!SCORE IT ...
3. langkawi =P
4. darling's bday? a lil surprise maybe?
DEC
1. pangkor first...
2. langkawi 2nd...
3. genting?
4. christmas....woooo....where?
5. NEW YEAR'S EVE...where to?where to?
6. ima get myself into one of the clubs this year... =P
so ya...the mooncake festival is here again =) i used to enjoy eating mooncake alot...but..urm i don't really fancy them much..i don't know why...things changed along with time.. =/ and i don't really like it...but hell we'll need to move on with our life..aint it?
i enjoy looking at the full moon...sadly..today i saw one dimmed and a crooked moon...not really crooked..just not as round as last time =) bah...so all we did in grandma's house today was...eat, game, sing, burnt and DRINK =D
all i did was eat, sing and drink..i don't game...i don't burnt anymore..haha..eating is always the first thing i do there.. =P the singing part just came in outta no where cox uncles suddenly wanted to sing k at home..so yah~ then then that drinking part was the funniest..
i asked one of the uncles to bring me to a club =) suddenly before i left..they chucked me half a bottle of heineken..the other uncle pushed the heineken away and gave me quarter glass of whiskey instead with ice of course =) i don't like whiskey smell..and this is when smething horrible happened..very smart of them to mix both whiskey and beer..i down-ed everything and they said OUH GONE!really need to bring her go club dy...she can drink..LOL =)
i love you uncles..haha...then aunty connie gave me a heart 2 heart talk...was really touched and i cried..wtf ? yah i cried...urm..it reminds me of wat had lead me of becoming like this =/ i don't know but a promise has to be carried out..so yah!stay tuned =)
nothing much and movie tomorrow...weeeeeee living my life to the fullest with my family and my darling =) i love you guys =D muackxx...muackxx...muackxxx
omg..is tough and it isn't easy when it comes to the end...of making a decision..
i'm not really decisive when things became like this..
there are stuffs that i couldn't decide and i ended up at the junction don't know where to turn..
ex: NOW...
urgh...i'm so sorry mah friend =/ miss vanny...aiyoh..haiy...so sorry for putting you into great trouble...T_T
anyway..today i went college BECAUSE i had a sesi with guna...okay..so i woke up lATE...and rushed out..*raining pulak*...my brain was telling me..hmm..lets get back to sleep..but i was determined to go college today..so------------I WALKED in and out, up and down...the house..i couldn't find my portable brolly =S
woke up mah mum...fetched me there..and gosh!the train arrived when i was purchasing ticket..I RAN as fast as i could to catch up with it..don't wanna be late for that sesi..fuck it lar!KTM is just so fucked up..i pressed on the buttons so many times..IT JUST WON'T FUCKING OPEN THE TRAIN DOORS..the train passed T_T wtf wtf..
hmm..next...when i took WANTED to take bus to darling's place..i saw 3 buses lining up in front of me..so i walked ASAF to see the numbers...just when i reached the 1st..the door shut..WTF...i was almost there...T_T the people in the bus looked at me and the bus left..i had no choice but to take a bus to mid valley then take a cab...waiting for the same bus would be an hour later...
bathed and continued with my maths..hmm...i see IMPROVEMENTS =) praise Lord...really...you know i sensed the God is urm..somehow guiding me back...because HE knows that i didn't really study much..that's why he MADE me felt more energetic during the night so that i could coupe up with my studies...although i had only 2 hours of sleep a day..still i don't really feel tired.. ^^
so off we went to taylors PJ right after fatty lum is done with his shower...STILL..we got ourselves stucked in that CRAZYMANIC jam in federal highway..made a turning into jln templer to hit the other way out...finally reached that place 45 mins LATE =/ i'm so sorry...it was really JAM...and because ct has his class till around 6pm when he came and picked us all up..there's nobody to blaime..just the TRAFFIC...
every year so many tourist visited our country..as a matter of fact we should be earning quite a lot.. BUT where the hell did all the money went?can't the stupid gov just spent like few millions getting better trains for KTM?!seek IMPROVEMENT please...urgh =/
malaysians really need to grow up i duno why..there aint much civilised citizens in here..for example, i'm not one =) hahaha..
